Valentine

General Feedback for ‘Valentine’ Critical Essay - **APRIL 23rd 2012**


 * __Areas of Strength:__ **


 * Essays were written in clear paragraphs which kept each point separate.
 * A good attempt to make use of the P.E.E. Technique throughout the essays.
 * Good understanding of the poem and its issues.
 * Good understanding of the relevance of the onion as a symbol for love and how it is used as an extended metaphor.
 * __Areas for Improvement:__ **
 * Remember to relate each paragraph to the essay question so that you show that you understand what you are being asked to do. This will help you to keep your answer relevant to the task.
 * Every paragraph must begin with a clear opening point or Topic Sentence. This will help to give your essay focus and will strengthen the structure of your essay.
 * Revise TARTS technique, it is crucial that you include a clear, relevant statement of intent.
 * Remember to fulfil your statement of intent. i.e. analyse the imagery **AND** the word choice if you have stated that in your introduction.
 * Watch the clock – allow yourself enough time to write a conclusion.
 * Proofread your work very carefully. This will help you to avoid careless mistakes, unclear writing.
 * More practice needed doing timed exercises.

Remember, this was an open-book test. You must memorise key quotations from the poem (as well as the short story and play) that you wish to use in your exam essays. = = =17th April - Notes from Class= = = = =
 * ‘Valentine’** Revision

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 * Themes:**

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 * Extended Metaphor:**

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 * Word Choice:**

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 * Valentine **** by Carol Ann Duffy **

= = Not a red rose or a satin heart.I give you an onion.It is a moon wrapped in brown paper. Symbolic idea that it is a bright gift It promises lightlike the careful undressing of love.Here. It will blind you with tears like a lover.It will make your reflectiona wobbling photo of grief.I am trying to be truthful.Not a cute card or a kissogram.I give you an onion.Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips,possessive and faithfulas we are,for as long as we are.Take it.Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,if you like.Lethal.Its scent will cling to your fingers,cling to your knife. = =

= = It is a moon wrapped in brown paper. = =

= = The connotations of ‘brown paper’: it’s functional, practical, perhaps a little dull which acts as a contrast to the light of the moon, which suggests hope and positivity. This image could suggest that inner beauty is important. Perhaps the ‘brown paper’ is a protective layer which shelters a person (within a relationship) from the pains of love and heartache. The ‘brown paper’ looks drab and dull in its appearance but when it’s removed and the flesh of the onion is exposed it’s bright and whitish. It presents a direct contrast to its outer shell, it’s more interesting. = =

= = Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring = =

= = At first glance, an onion seems quite boring. A person might be disappointed if their loved one gave them this as a romantic gift. It’s cheap, it’s unromantic. On a closer look, an onion is quite impressive. It is made up of layers which could symbolise the different stages of a relationship. It could symbolise/represent the romantic or friendship aspect of relationship or the commitment between lovers. The idea that the closer you get to the core of the onion, the tighter the loops get, thus representing commitment and depth to the relationship. = =

= = It will make your reflectiona wobbling photo of grief. = =

= = The pungent smell of the onion will sting your eyes and make you cry. Figuratively, love has its ups and downs and it can make you cry for different reasons: happiness, sadness, break-ups, joy, arguments, misunderstandings... The outward simplicity of the onion and its dull appearance is a paradox. It’s puzzling and contradictory, because under the surface, an onion is complex, just like relationships are. A ‘photo’ is a memento or memory, a visual image which is captured in our minds. I would suggest that ‘wobbling photo of grief’ is a symbol of a negative memory/period within the relationship; one that is hard to move on from. = =

= = Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips, = = As the extended metaphor develops throughout the poem, it becomes more aggressive. Words such as ‘fierce’ and ‘possessive’ have negative connotations, especially when associated with relationships. ‘Fierce’ suggests violence, something to be afraid of and ‘possessive’ suggests a controlling nature, a lack of freedom within a relationship. Neither of these things is healthy. This image literally means that the pungent taste will remain with you for a long time, it lingers just like love or lost love can. Even after you break up/end a relationship, the memory can take a long time to fade. It’s hard to disguise/cover up. = =

= = Its scent will cling to your fingers, = = This develops the previous image, even the fact that the image is being extended, dragged on, seems to symbolise how the taste of the onion can linger, just like lost love. It symbolises how the memory of love can remain and how it can become hard to make sense of as it fades. The word ‘cling’ suggests desperation, as if a person is unwilling to release their clutches/their hold/their control of a person. Again, this is a word with negative connotations, it suggests a neediness of a person, a lack of freedom within the relationship, especially when it’s coupled with the following line, ‘cling to your knife’. This last image suggests that the person being clung to is so stifled that they feel frustrated, angry, ready to be threatening! It’s an aggressive image, yet literally it refers to an onion, simply, being chopped. = =

= = = = = Homework for Wednesday 5th October 2011 = = = = Write an essay on 'Valentine' by Carol Ann Duffy. = = You have already begun writing the essay in class and you have just over a week to complete it. Below there are two documents to help you to complete the task: Critical Essay #1 Plan and Some Notes on 'Valentine'. The notes are intended to be a guide only. Use them to help you to form your own ideas. = = My advice to you is to access the wiki material from the school library before the weekend (if not at home). This means that if you have any problems logging on etc you can come and see me for a print out and still have ample time to complete the homework. = = I have copied and pasted the contents of the Word Documents below in case anyone has any trouble opening the files. =





'Valentine' Critical Essay Plan #1

We are going to write a Critical Essay about the poem ‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy. It will be a genuine ‘Past Paper’ question sat by SQA Intermediate 2 candidates in 2003. ** 2003 Intermediate 2 Past Paper: ** Choose a poem which increased your understanding of any aspect of life in the modern world. State what aspects of life in the modern world the poem illustrates and go on to show how the poem, both by its content and by its style, increased your understanding. In your answer you must refer to the text and to at least **two** of: ideas, theme, imagery, word choice, or any other appropriate feature. ** Structure of the Essay: ** **__ Paragraph One – Introduction __** Use TART to ensure you have included all of the relevant details in your Introduction. Reword or reuse the question to introduce the topic you plan to write about. Your introduction plays a vital role: it should state clearly what the rest of your essay will be about. //__ Valentine __//// by Carol Ann Duffy is a poem which clearly deals with the theme of love, something that I feel is a particularly significant aspect of the modern world. Duffy creates an extended metaphor where an onion is presented to symbolise love, this helps me to gain a deep understanding of the speaker’s attitude towards love and relationships. Duffy’s use of theme, imagery and word choice are of particular interest to me, as I will explore throughout my essay. // **__ Paragraph 2 __** In this paragraph you //may// wish to offer some background information about the poem (text). It is essential that you **do NOT** retell the story in great detail. You do not get credit for doing this and it is not relevant to the task. // The poem focuses on the theme of love and highlights the speaker’s dislike of the commercialism that surrounds Valentine’s Day. On the surface, the poem appears to be about all of the positive aspects of love and relationships; however, with closer study, it becomes clear that the speaker is also presenting the darker and more destructive points of relationships. //  Now you are going to write around five paragraphs – this is when you really start to answer the question. Imagine that you are structuring an argument: each point you make should be clearly laid out and should link on to the next point. Use **linking words** to help strengthen the structure of your essay and use the **PEE** technique to formulate your paragraphs. ** PEE ** ** P – Point ** (Make a point or statement in relation to the question) ** E – Evidence ** (Back it up with relevant evidence – quotation) ** E – Explanation ** (Analyse and Evaluate how your evidence effectively explains your original point.) ** Paragraph 8 – Conclusion ** Just like your Introduction states what you plan to write about, your Conclusion should sum up the main points of your argument. This is not the place to add extra information that you missed out, or where you introduce new ideas. You are drawing your arguments to a close.

__ Some Notes on ‘Valentine’ by Carol Ann Duffy __ These notes are intended for study/revision purposes only. They should be used as a starting point, as something to help to inspire you and to give you ideas. I have also avoided putting too much of my own opinion in here, you should be forming your own ideas and taking your own stance when writing critical essays. The poem focuses on the theme of love – the speaker scorns the commercialism and unoriginality or conventional Valentine’s Day gifts. The poet uses an extended metaphor throughout the poem. An onion is used to symbolise love and its many forms/depths. The poet explores the different senses: touch, taste, smell, sight and relates each to the onion and love. Word choice is of great significance. Key words you //could use// are as follows: cling, fatal, possessive, faithful... There are many others. The poet’s use of repetition: “I give you an onion”... etc. Ask yourself “Who is the speaker addressing?” The theme of the poem is not simply love but the difficulties surrounding it. There are examples of personification used – find these and comment on them. Reminder: Each time you make a comment regarding a technique that has been used/the writer’s style you must ensure that you provide a relevant quotation to justify/back up your point. You must then go on to Analyse and Evaluate your points fully.